Bridal Adventures

Amanda has been dressing for years and is gradually going further in her TG lifestyle. She regularly spends one to two days a week fully dressed and most holidays spending several days living 24/7. She is very lucky to have a very supportive wife and a brilliant beautician friend Jude who helps achieve a feminine body. Amanda regularly has nail and eyelash extensions done, full body waxing and eye brows shaped and tinted. Her ears were pierced years ago! Well, where is all this going? For over a year now Amanda has wanted a bridal dress to wear to a TG weekend run at a South Coast venue. Where does one start? How do you get help? Who could help? What styles would suit me? Let the story start! Firstly I contacted two local Bridal Shops and explained I was serious about dressing as a bride. I previously had sent them copies of articles I have had published in Repartee No 49, 61, 68, and 76. I also gave them photographs of me out and about. Would it be a problem helping me achieve my dreams? The answer came back no if I was serious and booked an appointment. I very quickly arranged appointments and the adventure started. I spent ages getting ready for the appointments. Everything needed to be perfect! With trepidation I arrived on time for my first appointment. Jane the owner could not have been more welcoming. She was fascinated by my journey and how I achieved my female persona and body shaping. I was told Amanda was very convincing! We talked for ages discussing my dream look. Out came a selection of dresses. Wow! I could not wait to get into to them. Jane also suggested a laced corset back was the best option. Well she said, you had better get undressed, I will help you get into them. My heart was pounding! I was in heaven! Deep inner feelings were triggered off. Jane helped me into the first dress. I felt and looked amazing. It seemed to take ages to get the lacing done up. She let me borrow some bridal shoes. Amanda, you look amazing, turn round and walk over to the mirror. I could not believe what I saw in the reflection. It felt so natural! We talked like girls all the time, I was so excited, more dresses to try on and results to see. Altogether I tried on six dresses. This was going to be an expensive day.

The dresses ranged from £800-£1500 and accessories and extras needed. Underskirts, shoes, bridal underwear, jewellery, the list goes on. We had a lovely time together. Amanda, I can see you are very serious about you female side Jane said. It has been a pleasure helping you but, have you thought about buying secondhand? You can get dresses altered. I can help with that side. You now know what suits you and a size 16 is a good fit. I have loved having you in my shop. It’s been a real pleasure getting to know you. Well I went away on cloud 9. The following week I went to my second appointment in another bridal shop. This time the owner Sally was just like Jane. She was very interested in the TG scene and I experienced the same experiences as I did with Jane. She was very supportive and enthusiastic. Again, I was in heaven! I had a lot to consider and think about. Was the secondhand route worth considering. Yes was the answer. I turned to the internet and discovered two really great sites (preloved.co.uk and Bride2Bride). Both proved to be a great resource with lots of dresses in my local area. I logged onto these sites regularly and saved possible dresses in a folder. I monitored prices, most dropped over the months and gathered ideas. Was I really ready to move forward? Yes I was! I found three possible dream dresses locally and emailed the advertisers explaining I was transgendered. Would this cause a problem? No came back the answer each time. I duly asked for more pictures and detailed measurements of bust, waist and hips. Both Jane and Sally gave me detailed dimensions to assist me in getting my dream dress. Well, the story continues. My first choice would be my dream come true! I pinged an email off to Sue and said I would love to come and see the dress. She was selling on behalf of her daughter who had emigrated to Australia and wanted the dress sold. Again with trepidation Amanda set off on another adventure fully dressed, feeling and looking the best I could. I found the hose easily, parked my car on the drive, walked up the path and knocked on the large house front door. Within seconds the front door opened. Come in Amanda, WOW you look fab! She gave me a hug and a kiss. Things were looking good. Her husband also warmly greeted me. Well Amanda, come upstairs and see the dress. I hope you like it! It was laid out in her daughter’s old bedroom on the bed. It looked amazing. Would it fit? Would my dreams come true? Well Amanda do you like it? Can I help you get dressed? Yes please I answered. Sue was fascinated in my story and transgendered issues. Do you mind if I see you in your lingerie Sue asked. No I said. Well I undressed and Sue helped me in. You are so brave she said. You do take Amanda so seriously. You look great. I hope the dress fits. I pulled the dress up, Sue laced me in. Wow she said, you look amazing. The fit is really good. She put on the veil and I looked in the mirror. I was lost for words! I walked around the room in heaven, the dress rustling and the long train and veil following me. My bridal dream had come true. This was my dream dress. I changed back into my blue Diva dress and we chatted and packed up the dress into it’s box. Cash was exchanged and I left in a dream that had just come true. The dress had originally cost £1400 and the veil £100. I got the whole package for less than £130. Sue had dropped the price three times over the year. Who said bargains can’t be found and had? If you need TG underwear, shape wear, lingerie or breast forms I can highly recommend a friend Geraldine Herd who runs a company called Hour Glass Figure. She has been involved and is very supportive to the TG community. She has set up this site to specifically help the TG Community. My dream dress just needed a very slight tweak with the back panel. I’m a perfectionist! Again a local dress maker friend helped out with this. She has altered dresses and skirts for me before. The fit now is AMAZING!! A dream has come true!! The story has not ended yet. Amanda is planning to go to a Bridal Event in Bournemouth in September run by Danielle who is well known and respected in the TG scene. Amanda is also aiming to retire this coming year and who knows where this will lead.I can’t wait and will report back hopefully with a part two of my Bridal Adventure.

Bridal Adventures (Part 2) – The Bridal Pageant

As you can see from the pictures, I did enter the Bridal Pageant at the Bournemouth Transgender Weekend. I had a stunning wedding dress and all the accessories.

My beautician friend Jude helped me prepare for the event. She suggested treatments that I would need and a time plan. Things kicked off a week before. A full body wax including everything off was required as I also wanted to use the hot tub and swimming pool. I had just bought a new swimming costume! A few days later followed a spray tan. A first for me. This was then followed by nail and eyelash extensions and my toe nails painted! I felt fantastic and looked amazing.

My very supportive wife was stunned when I came home. You are really going for it she said! It all felt so totally natural. I had planned to live 24/7 en femme for 7 days with her full support. I could not wait for the pageant at the end of the week. I drove to the hotel, parked up, went in and introduced myself. What a weekend it turned out to be. The hotel was not totally TG’s but a mix including other guests. There were about 35 TG’s some with partners, spouses. It was a fantastic event! The pageant, catwalk and interviews took place on Saturday. It was amazing. Such fun! Amanda got down to the last three after a catwalk and interviews and won highly commended. What a confidence boost.

Wearing the dress for most of the day was a real challenge. A ride in the Bentley was the ultimate experience around Bournemouth. I had completed my first pageant with flying colours!

Swimming en femme in the indoor pool felt so natural as did the hot tub. I had a lovely chat with three genetic women in the tub. All thought I was transsexual and was on hormones and had surgery. All thought I had put in a massive effort and had a lot of bottle to do what I had done. We met up again later in the bar and chatted more. What an experience. Out and accepted in the real world. Such fun! The three-day event whizzed by very quickly. It was soon time say good fare well and head home. I managed to keep my lashes and nails on for a couple more days before Jude removed them and I reverted to male mode!

The weekend was a real eye opener. I proved to myself I could live en femme. I had such a ball and did not want it to end. Deep feelings were triggered inside. I knew I would never be the same again! Amanda’s journey reached new levels. There was no going back!

The Beginnings (Part 4)

By now I was truly out! Many friends now knew about Amanda. We deliberated for ages as to whether to tell our son. We did when he was in his early 20’s. We were very unsure how he would react. To our astonishment totally unfazed! He totally understood and said it did not matter one iota! He had gay friends but no trans friends. He said he guessed years before that I was different but no issues! What a relief! Amanda has really grown and developed over the last few years! For a long time she had to fit in with work. It was not an easy time but, I’m now retired and can be Amanda far more regularly. I have wanted to present as a female more and more. Beauty treatments are now a regular feature. Eye brows plucked, shaped, waxed, tinted! All body hair removed by waxing and shaving, nail extensions and eye lash extensions added and worn whenever possible, toe nails always painted and spray tans for a natural summer look. I also stated to wear perfume. My confidence was growing all the time. By now I had built up a huge network of supportive friends. Lynne was instrumental in sorting out my hair. She set up Femesque as a consequence of us meeting years before. Girlfriends in the beauty, fashion world were a great help in developing my looks and style. Over the years I have built up a network of TG supportive beauticians, the lists go on! As I’ve said in previous blogs TG supportive groups and societies have been a great help. The Beaumont Society, Fabuliss in Liphook now sadly no longer, Roses Repartee, Transliving , The Surrey Outcrowd have all been embraced. The internet has really been helpful in finding out more and answering questions. Going away en femme to transgender weekends has given me a new perspective and look on the TG Scene. Being asked to talk to groups and people about TG issues has been a great way to gain confidence and give a little back. The Surrey Swans Group has given me openings and opportunities including like with the Police. The TG scene is now far more oped, out and main stream. A lot of my female supportive friends are getting far more enquiries for help, advice and support. Shops are happy to arrange TG events and functions. Personal shopping is freely available in many top shops and companies. Local department stores have asked for advice on how to help, support and embrace the TG Community. So where is all this going? Well I’m so fortunate to have such a supportive wife. She still finds it challenging but we keep talking and exploring. She was very supportive when I started laser hair removal. She also suggested I start having professional TG Counselling which I have been doing for a couple of months.

The Beginnings (Part 3 )

After a lot of talking with my wife Amanda became accepted! I started visiting several Dressing Services in Portsmouth, London and Chichester. The most helpful was Jane in Chichester. She ran a hair and beauty salon and understood that I did not want to look like a drag queen but, wanted to present myself as a genetic woman. She was great and took me under her wing. She taught me how to dress convincingly, do my hair and make up, how to present myself in public. She also ran a support group and we regularly went out for day trips and evening events in the real world. I also joined the Beaumont Society and went along to support groups. I soon found out I was not alone on this journey of discovery. So what came next? I started to wear silicone breasts glued to me chest and hip and bottom pads. Concealing my male parts more realistically proved fun and a real challenge. I was involved in technology and have been able to make a latex rubber female anatomical form which is glued in place using Hollister medical adhesive. This looks, feels and makes me function like a woman. It can be worn all day. Even my wife was amazed at the illusion. It’s very convincing and hides everything. Similar devices are available on line. I can now wear a swimming costume, go in a hot tub and the sea and not feel vulnerable or exposed. Buying my first swimming costume was fun! I went to M & S and asked for help. I tried on several and selected a blue fitted controlling costume. It gave me a curvy shape. The sales lady asked if she could see me dressed in the costume. Wow she said! You look amazing! She was convinced I had surgery! No man bits! Correct under clothing is very important. For years I have used Marks and Spencer’s, and local Lingerie shops. Correct measuring and fitting is freely available. Everyone I have met has been very helpful and supportive. Realistic results can be achieved. Make up was my next priority. Luckily I have fair hair and light beard cover. Beauty counters and make overs in High Street stores helped develop my look. I also had my ears pieced as part of my feminisation. I had always loved earrings but, made do with clip ons and magnetic fastenings. Amanda now has a lovely collection! Hair came next. Wigs on line! Not a total success. The internet and some issues with styling, colour and maintenance! Clothing and image are very important to me. Amanda is an educated professional, just like her male counterpart. She likes the smart professional look. I’m lucky to be a size 14-16 and have small feet size 40. Local dress agencies were brilliant. I’ve used them for many years. The women who own them have become friends. Also, local boutiques are more than happy to let you try on clothes. Again always be open and honest. Your money is as good as anyone’s. Amanda has never had a problem using her male credit or debit cards. She now has a full summer and winter wardrobe. So there we have it. It takes me an hour to an hour and a half to become Amanda. Where does she go? Anywhere and everywhere, day and night, weekends and weeks away fully en femme. Any excuse I’m dressed and away. Amanda by now was really taking off! Where to I was very unsure! I needed some therapy and counselling and managed to find an NHS set up in Hampshire through a transgender group called Fabuliss that used to meet in Hampshire, (now not running, a sad loss!) I was very apprehensive about going along but it was a real discovery. After several sessions and some psychological tests I came out with a profile saying I was 76% female. This explains a lot! My brain was wired up in a very feminine way! This led on to a long journey of more searching discovery. Amanda was by now going out en femme as often as possible. Regular beauty treatments in local salons helped in the feminisation process. Eye brows tinted and waxed to a more feminine arch, nail extensions, painted toe nails and finger gel and acrylic extensions, spray tans, body hair removed, the list goes on. If you want to look convincing you have to make the effort my incredibly supportive wife told me.

The Beginnings (Part 2)

After the fancy dress party my mind was spinning! We drove back to Jenny’s house, my head was still spinning! I loved the feel of female clothing, a hairless body, make up and was fascinated by the whole feminisation process. Was this normal? Why was I like this? Could I be Amanda again? How could I keep her secret? I was muddled and confused. I had no female clothes of my own. Who could I talk to and share Amanda with? Over a coffee Jenny and I started to chat. Something has happened inside you tonight she said. Something inside you has been triggered off. I’ve been watching you during the evening, you were totally natural! I could see you were enjoying being Amanda and you were fully embracing the whole feminisation process. You look great she said. My clothes fitted you really well. Your legs look great in tights and wearing high heels you were a natural! I never imagined you would go this far! It was really late now! You had better start removing my clothes and make up. You can stay the night if you want in the guest room. Keep the bra, panties and tights on if you like and you can borrow a night dress of mine! Your secrets are safe with me. Amanda was born! In the morning all traces of Amanda were removed including all traces of bright pink nail varnish. We chatted over breakfast. I had no answers! Just lots of questions. Jenny listened, you can keep the tights as a reminder of the evening she smiled, we hugged and said goodbye. This was the late seventies! Amanda would have to go back into her box. I was also in my last year at college training to be a teacher. I would have to put her on the back burner and knuckle down to working for exams and looking for a job. A few months later I started going out with a nurse who was eventually going to be my wife. I was terrified to tell her of Amanda, a fantasy in my mind fearing she might reject me. This was a really hard choice! It was years ago. I was very confused! The TG scene was not really open . It was emerging from the under ground! There was little openly published and no internet to research on, nobody to ask.

We did get married eventually and bought an old Victorian house that needed a complete refurbishment. I had also started a demanding teaching job in a big comprehensive and my wife working in the large local hospital. Again a fancy dress party reared its head. My wife and a girl friend of hers suggested I would make a good looking woman. Little did she know! I loved the idea and went along with it. This time I was going in a nurses uniform. Again the full works! Hair removal was a requirement along with a nurses uniform, starched apron and hat, UCH London! My wife insisted I was fully feminised. She hated seeing men halfheartedly dressed en femme at parties. She borrowed my uniform from her friend Clare. My wife was a size 10 and I was a 14-16. Clare let her borrow her uniform, a dress , apron, hat , shoes and underwear! This was to include black stockings, suspenders, lingerie and a full length slip! After a hot bath the transformation took place. I was given a full make over including toe and finger nails painted, eyebrows trimmed and shaped. Getting fully feminised again was an incredible sensation. I had never worn stockings and suspenders before or a full length under slip. I was in heaven! My wife went dressed rather conservatively to me. She borrowed a hospital theatre gown and went as theatre nurse. We had a great time at the party. I loved every moment and the attention I was getting. Memories flooded back from my first adventure en femme. It felt totally natural as Amanda.

After the party the floodgates opened. We drove home, I was very quiet! What’s the matter she asked? I did not want to take the clothes off. Amanda was out of the box! She was never going back in! We talked for most of the night. Was I gay? Did I want a sex change? No! Why did you not tell me? What’s wrong with me? Am I not attractive? What will neighbours, friends, family etc. think or say? You’re not the man I married. It was a massive shock for her. Being a nurse she had experience with transexuals and transgendered people professionally but, now she was married to one. I need time to work thing out, I still love you but, where is this all going? It took several years to sort out and come to terms with and, amazingly she has supported me fully along the way. You can’t help the way your brain is wired she said. I’m very fortunate to have her. Ground rules needed to be worked out. If you are going to go out as Amanda regularly you need to look convincing and passable. A wardrobe will need to be created.

She does not want to get very actively involved though. She lets me dress at home and go out regularly with the proviso that if a going out in public I must look as convincing as possible. We do go out several times a year as two girls. Achieving my female persona has been far easier than I thought possible. Honesty and openness have greatly helped. I approached a local beauty salon in male mode and explained my desire to dress regularly as a woman and create a feminine image. “No problem” was the answer. “How far do you want to go? A full body wax arms, legs and chest was suggested along with eyebrow waxing and shaping. Was I up for it? Yes I was! The girls who ran the salon wanted to see Amanda dressed. Was I up for that? Yes was the answer. A date was booked for the following week and Amanda emerged smooth and shaped. The finished results were slightly painful but really worth it. The girls recommended I purchased an Epi Lady and wet shaved to keep smooth. The combination works really well. Amanda was now fully out of the box. There was no going back!

PS. Jenny is still a really close friend, she knows all about Amanda and how she has evolved to what she is today. We talk about her regularly but, she has kept her secrets as promised!